Self-Harm
If you are having thoughts of suicide or in crisis, reach out immediately. Ring 999, go to A&E, or contact Samaritans (116 123), Shout (text 85258), or CALM (0800 58 58 58). Visit Get Help Now for more options.
What is self-harm?
Self-harm is when someone deliberately injures themselves as a way of coping with emotional pain or overwhelming feelings. It can take many forms - and it is never about attention-seeking. It is a sign that someone is in real distress and needs support.
Many people self-harm. You are not alone, and it does not make you “broken” or “bad”. It is a human response to unbearable feelings - and there are other ways forward.
Self-harm and neurodiversity
People who are neurodivergent - including those with ADHD, autism, dyspraxia, and other neurodivergent differences - experience self-harm at significantly higher rates.
- Around 3 in 10 neurodivergent young people report self-harm, compared to 1 in 10 in the general population.
- Studies within a systematic review report odds ratios ranging from approximately 4 to 8 times higher risk of self-harm in people with ADHD.2
- Among autistic people experiencing burnout, 63% reported recent thoughts of self-harm or suicidal ideation.
Research consistently shows neurodivergent people are at significantly elevated risk of self-harm. This is driven by emotional dysregulation, sensory overwhelm, and unmet support needs - not by choice or character.1 2
This is not a coincidence. It reflects real, neurological differences in how we process emotion and stress.
Why self-harm feels necessary
Emotional dysregulation
Neurodivergent brains often process emotions intensely and struggle to regulate them. Feelings can arrive suddenly and feel overwhelming - rage, shame, loneliness, or numbness that feels unbearable.
Self-harm can feel like it releases that pressure, or makes emotional pain “real” and therefore manageable.
Shutdown and overwhelm
When the world feels too loud, too much, or too fast, neurodivergent people often experience overwhelm or shutdown. Self-harm can be a way of regaining a sense of control when everything feels chaotic.
Feeling numb or disconnected
Some people self-harm to feel something - because the emotional numbness or dissociation that comes with stress, trauma, or burnout feels worse than pain.
None of these reasons mean you are “doing it wrong” or that you need to be ashamed. Your brain is trying to survive an unbearable situation. Understanding that is the first step toward finding different ways forward.
Self-harm is not attention-seeking
This is important: self-harm is not attention-seeking. It is a sign of genuine distress.
Many people who self-harm hide it because they know others judge them. They are coping in the best way they can with feelings that feel unmanageable. That deserves compassion, not criticism.
Getting support
You do not have to manage this alone. There are people and services ready to help.
Immediate support
- If you are in crisis or having thoughts of suicide: Call 999 or go to A&E.
- Samaritans: 116 123 (24/7, confidential, free)
- Shout: Text 85258 (24/7 crisis text support)
- CALM: 0800 58 58 58 (5pm - midnight, if you are struggling with suicide)
Professional support
- Your GP can refer you to talking therapies, crisis teams, or mental health services. Tell them what you are experiencing - they have heard this before.
- Our Ask a Counsellor service lets you put private questions to a registered counsellor
- Our Online Community connects you with other neurodivergent people who understand
- Use our Local Services directory to find hospitals, charities, and support services near you
Specialist organisations
- Mind: https://www.mind.org.uk/self-harm - Information and resources on self-harm and mental health.
- Self Injury Support: https://www.selfinjurysupport.org.uk/ - Dedicated support for people who self-harm.
- Harmless: https://harmless.org.uk/ - Resource and community for self-harm recovery.
How to talk about self-harm
If you are thinking about telling someone - a friend, family member, therapist, or doctor - here is what might help:
- Choose someone you trust.
- You do not have to share details. “I am self-harming and I need help” is enough.
- It is okay if they are shocked or upset. That is their response, not your responsibility.
- If they respond badly, that says something about them - not about you.
If someone tells you they self-harm:
- Listen without judgment.
- Thank them for trusting you.
- Avoid “why would you do that?” - they are coping, not being illogical.
- Ask what they need: support, practical help, or just someone to listen.
- Encourage professional support, but do not force it.
Recovery from self-harm is possible. Many people find new ways to cope, understand their emotions better, and build lives where self-harm is no longer necessary. Support, time, and self-compassion make that possible.
Moving forward
Self-harm often reflects something deeper - unmet needs, untreated neurodivergence, trauma, or overwhelming life circumstances. Real change often happens when those underlying things get addressed.
A therapist who understands neurodiversity can help you:
- Understand what triggers self-harm for you.
- Develop new ways to cope with intense emotions.
- Process difficult experiences.
- Build self-compassion instead of self-criticism.
This takes time. Progress is not always linear. But healing is possible.
If you are in immediate danger, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. You can also contact the emergency services anytime, day or night. Your life matters. Visit Get Help Now for all crisis support options.
Clinical review note: This page is a draft and requires review by a clinical advisor before publication. If you have feedback, please contact us.
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NHS Digital. (2024). Adult Psychiatric Morbidity Survey: Survey of Mental Health and Wellbeing, England, 2023/4. https://digital.nhs.uk/data-and-information/publications/statistical/adult-psychiatric-morbidity-survey/survey-of-mental-health-and-wellbeing-england-2023-24 ↩
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Allely, C.S. (2014). The association of ADHD symptoms to self-harm behaviours: a systematic PRISMA review. BMC Psychiatry, 14, 133. https://doi.org/10.1186/1471-244X-14-133 ↩
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CHS Healthcare. (2023). The Challenges Faced by Neurodivergent People Accessing Mental Health Services. https://www.chshealthcare.co.uk/the-challenges-faced-by-neurodivergent-people-accessing-mental-health-services/ ↩
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Mantzalas, J., Richdale, A.L., Adikari, A., Lowe, J. & Dissanayake, C. (2024). Measuring and validating autistic burnout. Autism Research, 17(2), 386-399. https://doi.org/10.1002/aur.3129 ↩
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